Archives for posts with tag: Winston Churchill

Love Is A Game That Two Can Play And Both WinWinston Churchill and I have something in common. We both believe that our most brilliant achievement was our ability to persuade our wives to marry us. There is nothing else that I have ever done that comes close to it.

Jamie and Lena- Valencia 2016-1

After forty-eight years of marriage to the same woman I can attest to the inestimable value of a life partner who loves you and supports you through good times and bad times. One who lives out the vows to love, honor and cherish. For better or worse. Richer or poorer. In sickness and in health. I also understand that having a good marriage requires a lot of patience and effort on the part of both persons.

divorce decree document and paper family figures Stock Photo - 10180323

Recently I saw a billboard that offered to help folks who wanted to “Undo the I Do.” There is no question that marriages can grow stagnant. Relationships can become strained. One or both parties may stray from their marital vows. With our human frailties and limitations, divorce sometimes may be the best alternative.

Every marriage has its ups and downs. Marriages that seem to be “made in heaven” often have to “live through hell” before they survive. Yet, in spite of everything, sometimes divorce might be the best choice. Marriage litigation experts can be helpful but I hope that everyone will try to “re-do” the “I do” before coming to the decision to make the marriage null and void.

Falling In Love

Mignon McLaughlin suggests that “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”  Falling in love may be easy but staying in love is an ongoing exercise.

Marriage therapy, communication, relationship advice:

There are many keys to a successful marriage. “Marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership of equals, with neither exercising dominion over the other, but, rather, with each encouraging and assisting the other in whatever responsibilities and aspirations he or she might have” (Gordon B. Hinckley).

Sometimes maintaining marriage vows is depicted as a burden and a duty. Although it is a responsibility to be taken seriously, I do not see it as bondage. Instead I believe it is a privilege that provides rich rewards.

Happiness in marriage is doing little things for each other repeatedly. Common courtesies and kind deeds that are present before marriage continue in daily life. It has been said (humorously I hope) that when a man opens the car door for his wife it is either a new car or a new wife. While I understand that customs have changed and women certainly are not “the weaker sex,” little gestures of courtesy are still important in a marriage relationship. Each “serves” the other with gratitude. These “little” acts of affection make up the hundreds of tiny threads that bind marriage partners to each other.

The illusion that everything will just turn out magically without having to communicate thoughts, feelings, and needs in a relationship is an immaturity that will make true connection impossible.:

Another key to a healthy and happy marriage is the recognition that each person in the relationship is unique and it is not necessary that both persons thinks alike and share all the same interests and skills. Ogden Nash said, “Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.” That is to say it is a good thing when each one brings something different to the relationship and those differences are seen as complementary rather than competitive.

I am no expert on marriage and I have made many mistakes in my relationship with my wife. I am extremely grateful for God’s grace that has been extended to us as we have worked together to make our marriage as healthy and happy as possible. I realize what Franz Schubert said is true. “Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife.

Jamie Jenkins

 

Perfection is a goal that can never be achieved. No matter how good a person is, no matter how hard one tries- nobody is perfect.

PERFECTION 2

It is seldom that our imperfection appears for all the world to see. Stephen Gostkowski was not so fortunate last Sunday.  Over 51 million people were watching his shortcoming and millions more read or heard about it through news media or friends.

Gostkowski is an American professional football player for the New England Patriots. He is the most accurate kicker in the team’s history and one of the most accurate kickers in the history of the National Football League. He holds the record for highest average points per game scored over a career (8.67 points per game as of the end of the 2014 season).

He is the Patriots’ all-time leading scorer, the team’s all-time leader in field goals, and he holds the NFL record for consecutive extra points- 523 times the kicker has successfully executed the point after a touchdown.

Nine years since he missed one- until last Sunday.

ESPN said the missed kick early in the game “had lasting ramifications throughout Sunday’s AFC Championship Game.” If he had made the extra point, his team would not have had to attempt a two-point conversion that was intercepted with 12 seconds left in the game resulting in the Denver Broncos winning 20-18 and advancing to the Super Bowl.

Gostkowski said after the game that he felt like the miss “lost the game” for the Patriots. “It was my fault, 100 percent. I just didn’t hit a good kick.”

PERFECTION 3

Teammates and coaches rallied to Gostkowski’s defense. They acknowledged his contribution to the team’s winning efforts all season long. “It’s not Stephen’s fault at all,” special-teams captain Matthew Slater said. “We definitely wouldn’t be here [in the AFC title game] without him.”

Teammate Rob Gronkowski said. “It’s a team game. It’s not one individual’s fault. You can’t put it on the hands of Stephen.”

Cornerback Logan Ryan called him “the best kicker in the league”and other teammates had similar messages. In spite of all the support, Gostkowski said. “I never would have thought missing a kick in the first quarter would be the difference in the game, but that’s why you’ve got to be good all the time.”

PERFECTION 1

Stephen, no one can be “good all the time.” Everybody makes mistakes. No one should give less than their best but nobody is perfect.

What do you do when your best is not good enough? Winston Churchill said, “Sometimes doing your best is not good enough. Sometimes you must do what is required.”

Lawrence D. Elliott said in a Huffington Post blog, “Admitting when we just don’t measure up is difficult for many people. They believe it’s a sign of weakness to admit one’s deficiencies.” He goes on to say, “Although it does sting, the realization that you’re not good enough should not be an ego-crushing experience. It’s a recurring thing in our lives, so we’d better learn how to deal with it. It happens in all areas of our existence.”

PERFECTION 6

Christian singer Amy Grant confesses, “I did the best I could, and in some arenas my best was not good enough. I’ve made some bad choices.” That is true for all of us but we must learn to forgive ourselves. Most importantly, we must learn to accept forgiveness and affirmation. Nobody is perfect.

Forgiveness is a divine attribute. We need to learn to accept it for ourselves and to offer it to others.

Jamie Jenkins